starhead @ blog again

The last entry in my blog was a long time ago.
Not due to the fact, that I was to lazy or busy to write entries, more
because I wanted to wait and to watch what will happen in the next lessons of our
English seminars.

The following seminars where a series of presentations on various topics and I wanted to
watch, what people will tell in their presentations and what information they deliver to us.

I think, if I remember right, I was the second one who had a presentation. Afterwards I could
"relax and sit back" and enjoy all the following presentations and topics more easily during the following lessons.

After some seminars, I recognized that I really enjoy going to the
classroom and listening to a presentation on a topic, related to Internet, Web and areas which are related to us, as future media-designers (hopefully).

The topics where quite interesting and every presentation contained
a bunch of new informations for me.

"Finding Informations on the Web",
a topic which is very useful in our time of information.
We all need informations, we all are dependent on information.
So the most useful skill is, how to find them, to know what tools to use,
what technology we can use to achieve useful informations
and contents out from the world wide web. It is not just Google which helps,
there are a lot of different search-machines with different technologies, which deliver
different search-results. Index-based engines, metha-crawler-engines and hybrides.
Every engine will deliver different search-results because of its technical character.
So it is useful to know what we can use, what we have to use in our different cases and belongings.

another topic which was quite interesting for me was the topic
"Internet and Ownership".
first I thought, it will be a quite boring topic, but *!* i was wrong.
Probably, because the two ladies served the contents in a very fresh manner,
interesting and reduced to facts, delivered nicely through different media-types, like little movie-clips, powerpoints and stressed out by a good flow of their speech.
I must say, ownership is a huge and important topic nowadays. Everyone can post, write, publish contents on the net and so far the question of ownership is present more and more.

Back to the topics in whole, ....
we all had to deal with a topic by our choice,
this means preparing a topic requires to deal with that topic, to dive into the material and
to learn and dig up the ground of it. Also to handle it with criticism and consciousness.
So the result was, that I learned beneath how to present, how to act in front of an
audience and some aspects more, ... I learn and gathered knowledge on different
specific areas around the web, net and the nowadays data-information-highways.
And all the knowledge was spread and given to us by ourself.

It was a nice and easy way to learn bit by bit
about upcoming technology and new media, packed into
seminars which primary taught us how to present, speak and act in front of an audience.

Memorandum to: Haj_O
From: Haj_O
Date: 12.12.2007
Subject: Alzheimer and what u have 2 do tomorrow; confirming the memo immediatly !


I have noticed, that your weakness is going more and more worse by the days
passing by and your increasing age.
So it is highly recommended to read this memo, to understand this memo,
to read it twice and to do all things which are listened below; also to confirm
afterwards, that you have done and understood all instructions properly.
Please confirm afterwards!

1) important! ---> write down all the instructions you did during this procedure!
2) start to pick up paper and pen, write down: now i have paper and pen
3) read the memo properly, just write down: yes, i read it.
4) read the memo again and go on on here: go to the bedroom and adjust your alarmclock to 6:30 morning
5) write down when your alarm-clock is adjusted properly to the right time
6) check the time of your alarm-clock and write it down
7) compare the time u adjusted the alarm-clock with the time listed under 4)
8) confirm just with writing down: yes, correct adjustment
9) brush your teeth and gotoAndSleep(); : if _var_teeth.clean gotoAndWriteDown: teeth == o.k.;
10) sleep now; this you don´t have to write down
11) if you are awake now, pleas confirm: i am awake now
12) dress up, take the small coffee i prepared in the thermos-flask and go to school now
13) lock the door, go to the bus and tell the bus-driver " kick me out at the FH-Dornbirn, i am oblivious
14) confirm that you are on the way, writing: i am on the way to school
15) after the busdriver kicked you out at school, go to the classroom B407
16) confirm, when you reached this classroom, enter it and write down: i am in now!
17) sit down properly and don´t chat with your classmates
18) confirm: i am not chatting and sitting properly
19) listen to the teacher and do what she tells you during the lesson
20) confirm that u did everything properly during the lesson writing: yes, i was doing everything properly
21) can u hear the bell ringing?
22) confirm, if you heard the bell ringing: yes, the bell rang
23) gotoAndMoveTo.D202(); function=wait {wait.till.teacher.comes};
24) confirm your waiting, write down; i am waiting in D202
25) take your next lesson and confirm: i am in the next lesson
26) same as at point 21) to 22)
27) confirm it: yes i did
28) gotoAndWaitForBus; gotoBus; funktion=step() {step_in.Bus_Nr_56};
29) confirm when you are in the bus 56; write down: i am in now
30) tell the bus-driver " i am a bit obliviouse and kick me out at the Kirchplatz"
31) confirm when u arrived the Kirchplatz and gotoHome(_immediatly);
32) confirm when u arrived at home, writing down: i am at home now
33) sit down and wait till i come back home, confirm: sitting / waiting
34) make an email with all your confirmations and send to: haj_O@students.fhv.at
35) press send-button
36) confirm, that you sent the email, sending another email to: haj_O.@students.fhv.at
37) just wait for me.
38) confirm it via email, same under point 36)


Thank you for your attention and just wait.
Nothing else do!


with best regards,
H

the presentation took quite a long time to prepare.
i was not astonished about that, because i already knew, that preparations on a particular topic
can consume a lot of time.

Our topic was the "new web", the so called "web 2.0" .
although i knew a little about that topic, it was much to do, to learn, to read and to prepare.

when we were working out the topic, it came to my mind, that it is an important thing to know
more and really much more about the theme and subject than the audience does.
not just to be able to answer questions properly.
i recognized, that it is not possible to handle a theme
and talk about a topic in a fluent and (more or less) understandable way when the speaker is not proficient.
most people of the audience knew not much about the theme. so an additional point was to get an overview and to reduce the contents to their essence and main-points and serve this in little and digestable peaces to the listeners.
and this is just possible, when the speaker knows, what he has to speak about and knows the wider area of his subject.
it´s like looking on something from a farer point.

anyway, so we had to read and inform us very well and could enjoy to explore a new topic more deeply and learn new things. all in all we worked on that theme for about two weeks more or less periodically and so we were not in a hurry or stressed with the preparation.

in the meetings with my presentation-partner Marina we discussed the contents always for new, stroke out some of them and added some new points we wanted to explain.
it seemed, as more as we knew about the web 2.0 as more the contents changed and the process to balance and choose, add or let fall different points of the theme was interesting to watch. at the end, we knew much about the topic, but we were aware, that we cannot deliver all that we know now within 30 to 40 minutes.
so, the process of reduction and condensing started in the last days again.

anyway, we felt good and safe to present the theme web 2.0 and while sitting together and working on the topic surprisingly we were looking forward and joking sometimes what
all could happen to us, what mistakes we could do and we had fun, joy and laughter on preparing the topic.
we were in a surprisingly good mood.

but,
but, but, ...
when the day comes and
the line falls down, the beamers strike, the computers run with bugs, the flipchart burns down, the files don´t open, the network does not work, ...
what is to be done then?

well, so it happened.
two hours before we did a last check in a room in the library and figured out, that we cannot open anymore the powerpoint-file correctly.
the powerpoint was written on microsoft, then worked out on a mac with open-office and saved again. the file didn´t really like that procedure. the formatting was gone. *ups!*. 
quick and hurry, working again, and also preparing a pdf, for the worst case, stored on the hard-disk, on an external hard-disk-drive and on an usb-memory-stick for the very worst cases! ... pdf would work also to present a theme, so we decided.
"mhhh", i thought, always that struggling with technique!
but finally we solved it, even in last minute.

so we were in good mood and looking forward again
and we were sure to do a good, interesting and fluent presentation.

but,
but, but, ....
the story went on , ...
the flipchart wasn´t burned down, when we entered the classroom, ..
that gave us a positive attitude.
the next thing was, there was no adapter for the mac-book to the beamer.
okay, we have the files on a stick, on a hard-disk and we could eventually use another computer,
but in that case we would have to cancel some prepared stuff which i wrote in html on my hard-disk and to perform some explanations and application in a pure old-school-telnet-shell on a unix-server could be a problem.
so we went out to search for an adapter. meanwhile we discussed the point that we have to reorganize our contents and that i have to do parts of topics i want to talk about more or less free, in the case we cannot solve the technical problem with the beamer. Marina was a bit worried about that because she was involved in my parts.
first i was stressed too, after a while i thought: " no problem, i can do that more or less easily."
Finally we told each other " ah, come on, we can handle that, we can do it! " and we both calmed down more and more.
so, finally we could find such an adapter and she show went on ......

back to the classroom and willing to do a good presentation, switching back from the new rearranged concept we shortly discussed on the way to find that line-adapter.

next problem appeared. a well known and widely beloved thing, called screen-resolution.
and the story went on. 600 x 800 ? 1024 x 768? no centered screen? why a video-mode? huuh!
i was a bit down with my nerves again.
a class-mate helped a lot to solve that problem, ... but it was not really satisfying for me.
i decided innerly to put away all that technical-garbage and do the presentation free and also without technical aids. Marina didn´t like that idea really. i could understand her. so, we both switched back again to the former concept we discussed while we were on the adapter-odyssee.

finally, after a while we also could solve that beamer and screen-resolution problem.
switching back to the old presentation-concept again.
"hmm, that is surprising me now, how flexible we are! switching here and there, back and switching somewhere!" *ironically thoughts on myself and the thoughts: "what will happen next!? "*

there was not much more, .... beside the problem, that the network-cable was not working.
so we had to use the wireless-lan. in that case we could not show a movie-clip we wanted to show.
fortunately i had some of the html files on my hard-disk and the telnet-session didn´t need much traffic. so it worked at least partly. some other things we wanted to show we had to cancel and finally we had to rearrange and adapt our presentation slightly from time to time and situation and topic.

i must admit, after switching between two concepts in 20 minutes many times and rearranging the presentation while talking i lost a bit the plan of all and it took much energy and concentration with which we were charged before we started.

well, all in all, i think, under such circumstances we surprisingly did our jobs more or less not so bad and
after all we got a perfect lesson for our presentation-future!
what i will do in future for sure is:

"always check the technical stuff before! the best would be to check it twice!
the very best, maybe to check it trice! "

i think it could be also a good idea to have a presentation in once´s backhand which can be done in case of problems without technical aids. in our situation this would have given a lot more safety, less stress and more space for having joy with the presentation itself.

H

A spelling style is
a style is a style is a style
is a style is a style is a style . . . . .



Pirates often drink much rum.
Pirates often stink.
Pirates often don´t sing but hum.
Pirates say what they think.

Pirates don´t go to toiletts,
Pirates normally do pee
From the boat with greatest joy,
Directly into the sea.

Pirates do not write a proper style
Pirates just write and they scrible along while
Pirates think on a topic intense
I admit, most times without sense ;-)



This is a little poem i just wrote for a friend, from the other English-group, ....
and i want to deliver this little poem directly to switzerland to her.
The reason is, that we had a discussion on the different spelling styles
which we both are used to write.

Dear friend, i hope you understand the meaning of my little "poem"
which i want to give u as a present.

Pirates write ugly, sometimes like rude,
other people write more nice and much, much more elegant.
Both are writers,
even they write different.

That is good in a way and absolutely necessary.
What would be a painting without different nuances and coloures?
What would be music without different variations and sounds?

Without different spelling styles
the world of sentences and words would be monotone and boring, ....
different spelling styles and ideas make the world multifariouse.

One is not better as the other one,
they are just different,
like a rose is a rose is a rose is a rose, . . . is . . .


a rose for Petranima


Ho ho ho, my pirate friend,
hoist the sails !

with best regards, ...
HajO

when i was in the typography-seminar, ...
all of us had to do a presentation on different topics,
concerning various types of fonts and it´s history in the sense of evolution.
partly it was very interesting, partly boring to listen to the people´s presentations.
it was boring due to the fact, that some people have not been really involved
and touched by the topic they have to perform.

anyway, ...
there was a guy, who had to perform a topic about a particular font
and he had , ....
a black-out.
totally.

when i was watching him, i could feel his powerlessness to overcome this situation.
and it lasted long. very long, till he said: sorry, i am gone.
after a while he said: o.k., i am here again.

i was really astonished about his courage, to handle such a deep and powerful impact in his
emotions so clear and conscious, and so candid.

i really could feel with him. for me as a listener, it was a strange feeling, when he had his black out.
on the one hand i did not want to help him. not to take away his situation to explore what´s going on, not to take away, the posibility to look behind his curtains, which were in front of his mind.
On the other hand, i really had the intention to ask this guy just a little question, which maybe would have helped him out of his powerlessness, just by asking him smthng.
just a little words, which would wake him up and dissolve his stress.

but i didn´t and in a way i felt ashame and accurate at the same time.

two days later this guy had to perform a short presentation in the English seminar which we share together.
the same situation happened to him again.
the environment of our seminar, where we learn how to present topics is safe and comfortable,
good for individual experiments, .... not to have fear smthng.
so it was really for him to "test" what´s going on with him.
and he went through this situation again.

"wow" i thought, this guy is really tough!
he is willing to deal with himself, ... "what a great guy he is", ...

he stands his person, like a man / woman."

anyway, to shorten the topic and my writings,

on the seminar next days, when the last one finished the presentation, he suddenly stood up
and said: i did not do my presentation. i will do it now. please pay attention.
He stood in front of us and he was speaking about his feelings and his emotions,
his beating heart, his perspiring hands, about his fears and his blockades, probably comming from an experience of his childhood.

in this moment i nearly wanted to yell out : yeahh! you ´r´ the man, u did it!

even if i did not know what he did, ...
but he did a great job, standing out there, and speaking about his emotions.

fnally i did not yell out, ...
i felt a great empathy with him, ...
i was glad for him, that he had the courage and the will to overcome his obstacles.
the courage to think and to speak about what he feels and what makes him problems.
an hour later, on the same day, in the next seminar, ... when i remember right it was psychology-stuff for media-design, . . .i sat beside him by coincidence and i gave him my congratulations for his performance.
he answered: thank you.
just simple: thank you.
that was it.

humans are beautiful.
especially these ones
who desire to walk a path
and dig in the unconsiousness for finding new wissdom.


that was the story and the learning what i got in this lesson.

I Tarzan, you Jane, go eat, Banana.

hmmm, that looks like somebody doesn´t speak English very well.

Last days i was wondering how it could feel for a native speaker, if he listens to me, when i am speaking English language or writing sentences. I am wondering where my level is and if i am falling still in the traps of making sentences in a German style-English, or obviousely a kind of a Tarzan-style-English. Most mistakes i do, so i think, is to "translate" German sentences and take over the grammar and parts of sentences
into English. I think, that this could sound very horibble to native speakers. But that mistakes seem to be difficult to explore and to bring to conscious.
I cannot compare, and that makes me a bit unsafe in speaking.

Normally, when i write German texts, i can choose between different styles, ...
simple styles and expression, archaic styles, styles which has been spoken in governments of old times, poetic styles and so on, ...
for me as a German native speaker it is simple to switch, but in English language,
it seem that there is no chance.
I would like to get the possability to play with the words and phrases more and more, but i think it´s a far way to there.

I have no idea how i could learn that and how to approach on that level of speaking and written words.
Maybe reading English historical literature, or selected texts and books?
I don´t know, ...
Maybe i will get an answer on that question in my courses.

 Though my many faults defaced me,
 Could no other arm be found,
 Than the one which once embraced me,
 To inflict a cureless wound?



H

Reading, reading, reading.
These words are following me since three weeks.

This was the topic of the third lesson.

During the lesson i could see, that i already use some of the skills and methods of the fast and
"excerptive" reading-technique, which Ms. Doshi taught and explained to us.

I was glad of that and i had the impulse to deepen this techniques more, because i noticed them as very useful and
time- and energy-saving skills. Because of this i ordered a book on the same day. The title of that book is "Visual Reading",
and the literature promises that is a good course to learn very fast and intense this kind of visual reading techniques.

During the lesson i remembered that i also use special techniques in reading, especially for scientific chemical papers which i had to read
during the time when i was working in the environmental institute.  After a time an many papers and pages,
I was used not to read just single lines, but more waving through the text in the manner of a serpent, or another kind of lines, like waves or zick-ziack-lines, grabbing the words and the content in a free and "flowing" way.

 I heard after a while, that his technique which i naturally explored by myself,  is taught in reading-seminars. But i never tried to enhance that
skill which came in my mind and reading-habbit naturally. So, i hope that book i ordered will help me to speed up and deepen my reading-skills
and to save my time and energy and also to bring more joy in reading and to overcome the threshold to say: okay, now i read this book
in an hour, or one and a half.

I think, the problem could be to deal with that methodes when i read in a foreign language, or read a book which material is not connected to a basic knowledge i already have. something really new, so i guess could be difficult to read even with that techniques. but time will show.

As an example, when reading a sci. chem. paper, over 20 pages, even in english language, i just used five or ten minutes and i had the content and the regulations in my mind. But that was due to the fact, that i already knew a lot of the formulations, vocabularies, expressions and also the basic content. So the input was more easy for me.

anyway, i was glad to be remembered on that topic during the lesson and
glad, that we were pointed with our noses to that topic and it´s importance.
When i look on my bookshelf, ... i can see half a meter of books i should read.
"Hopefully i will find the time i think, ...", when looking on that staple of books,
but better to think would be: I will read that books in a short time and looking forward to train that techniques.

Second Lesson

the second lesson was very interesting for me.
the reason was, that we had to prepare and to perform again a
presentation and this time i could focus on the performance better than the first time.

In general i am not really used to speak in front of people.
But this time, i could deal better with my nervosity and beneath that,
i could partly observe myself and structure my feelings
during speaking and acting more consciously.

In a way, it felt for me like a gestalt-therapeutic procedure. I had the feeling
after the lesson and some thoughts on parallels to that field of existential and
experiential psychotherapy stuff.

I do not want to describe the course as a kind of psychotherapy,
but the experiences reminded me on that.

During speaking it was interesting to see the content more and more going back to a second and not so important level in my consciousness, while the focus on what i feel and the focus on my experiences was enhanced in every present moment.
It was primarily a strange feeling but started to be a kind of pleasant flow after a while.
It was like somebody (mostly myself i think *grinning*) made me, as a better
expression, forced me to focus on the present moment, on acting, speaking and performing, gesticulation and mimicry.
On one point i caught myself thinking: " it is not important to focus on the content, i know the content anyway and it will flow into my mind on the right moment ... it is more important to focus on myself and on "my" listeners. "

I did a provocative joke at the beginning, as an intro. this was partly due to the fact,
that we did not really prepare a good presentation and that we did not find a red line when working on the content.
But we have been also driven by our interest to use the moment and the class as a platform just to experiment and to get to know and figure out, what will happen.

Marina, a co-student was willing to take the risk and to aid in that "experiment",
because she was also interested to see the reactions of the listeners and our reactions to. What we will make with that situation and platform, how we can handle that. A little self-experience journey started. Even it was just for a few minutes.

The feedback we got was showing us, that we have to be more sensitive and more conscious on what we do, how speak, how we formulate, look, act and interact and specially not to to miss the points, where we have to be patient and cautious with the listeners. Some reacted a bit shocked, as i could see in some faces, some disorientated, because it seemed, that nobody expected a "silly-provocative intro" like this.

The key for me could be to stay in the focus on graping the whole situation (included myself) and
use this as a self-regulating tool and as an insight for the way i act and perform.
Maybe like the gestalt-therapists do, working with a field-dynamic, including themself, but consciously.